Raising a Thinking Child and Raising a Thinking Preteen, both by Myrna B. Shure, Ph.D. with Roberta Israeloff, present a program called "I Can Problem Solve" for 4 to 7 year olds, and 8 to 12 year olds, respectively.  I picked up Raising a Thinking Preteen from my local public library, since my youngest child is 8. My comments, therefore, arise from reading this book, however the program is essentially the same for younger children using words and activities that are age appropriate.

The program is a way to help children "think for themselves in ways that [can] help them successfully solve everyday problems" (quotes are from the book Raising a Thinking Preteen).  "I Can Problem Solve" (ICPS for short) "not only helps children think more clearly, but also enhances relationships, builds trust, and makes both parents and children more confident."

Myrna Shure, Ph.D., is a developmental psychologist at MCP Hahnemann University in Philadelphia. The books are based on her research and experiences with children. According to her research "What parents want for their children - and children want for themselves - is to be able to make good decisions and to resolve conflict, whether the conflict is between peers, or with teachers or parents." The books offer a "set of specific skills which children can learn and master in order to become good problem solvers.  Here is a brief description of these skills:

"Understanding another's feelings and point of view, which enables children to appreciate that everyone may not think and feel the same way about things;

"Understanding motives, which enables children to understand that there may be reasons that propel people to do what they do at a given moment, and reasons beneath the surface that underlie behavior over time;

"Finding alternative solutions, which encourages children to think of all their options;

"Considering consequences, which encourages children to think ahead;

"Sequenced planning, which encourages children to make a sequenced plan that anticipates potential obstacles and considers timing issues, i.e., that problem solving takes time, and that some times are better than others for taking action."

The book spends one or more chapters on each of these skills. What I like about the book is that it not only describes the skill, it offers specific activities that a family can do to practice and encourage using each skill. Activities are offered for a variety of learning styles. The book includes examples of real children and how they use their knowledge. Three children (actually composites) are followed throughout the book - a 10 year old boy who is popular with his peers; an 11 year old girl who wants others to play with her but is rejected by her peers and who behaves aggressively, and a 9 year old girl who wants to have friends and play with others but who "stands around watching, waiting for children to invite her to play".

I think this book provides a helpful way to guide children in ways to effectively solve problems. I am also finding that it is opening my eyes to ways that I personally can look at problems and issues that arise.